Does this storyline sound familiar to you?
*It's 11pm on a Friday night. the stars are bright in the sky and the air is cool and moist. A man, a father, a husband, overflowing with love and care for his wife and kids, pulls into the paved driveway after a 14 hour shift. He uses as much of his energy as he can to step out of the car, legs shaking and feet sore. He walks through the door to see his wife sitting at the kitchen table with a mug of green tea. A tall lamp dimly lights the room (have to set that mooood, right?). When he sees her, he smiles and the long work day becomes worth it again to know she is taken care of. Little does he realize, while her body is flourishing and protected underneath the roof of their home, her heart is breaking. A drop of sweat runs down his forehead as he drops his bags and walks over to sit with her at the table. She lifts her face towards his with her deep relief that he's home and as he looks into her eyes, they well up with tears. She takes his hand in hers and opens her mouth to speak.
"Honey. I so appreciate your heart for our family and that you're willing to work hard to provide for us. We love you. And we miss you. In that, I want you to know that I would be more content with us living in a smaller house, having less money but have you home, than all of the money in the world without you here."
Annnnnnnnnnd SCENE.
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This article is not intended to demean money or hard work, but rather to get us thinking about where we've placed it in the priorities of our heart and mind.
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This might sound a little off topic, but trust me that I'm going somewhere with this!
Here's the facts. Down to every single pen and paperclip,
everything we own takes a chunk of our brain.
I’m currently in a season where I’m having to take it easy on clutter and commitments. I guess you could say because of that, I've been a bit hypersensitive to it all.
I keep seeing this picture of me just getting rid of stuff and being able to just relax and breathe in my open, white room. Just a couple plants in there and a table. Less for my brain to think about.
All the while, constantly remembering that the trunk of my car is LOADED, i'm talking three times as loaded than a baked potato (which is kind of how my brain's been feeling honestly LOL), with clothes I’ve been trying to get rid of. And the biggest reason I haven’t just wiped them from my life and given them to Goodwill is because a lot of them are worth a decent amount of scrilllll, if you know what I mean… money. Guap. Cash.
I had been trying to sell them, but hardly anyone was buying them and they were sitting there taking up space in my brain and STRESSING me OUT, bro. So much to the point, I would fall asleep thinking about it.
As I was laying in bed last night, the Lord spoke to me and we ended up having a conversation that revealed a part of my heart I was blind to. I think it’s funny how the moment we think we HAVE IT DOWN, He show’s us there’s more to be pruned! #prunemelordddd
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Here is the conversation:
why haven’t you gotten rid of the clothes, ari?
because i don’t want to lose money i could earn from selling them.
or waste money that i used to buy them.
but isn’t it stressing you out? a lot?
yes, it is. every single day. and it makes me feel sick to my stomach sometimes.
remember when you were in California last year?
yes, i do
remember how you hardly brought anything with you
AND you didn’t even have much money?
yeah..
you were happier than you’ve ever been, weren’t you?
yes, i was.
so why is making money off these clothes and material things, more important than your mental and physical health? if you were to just give them away — just give them away — how would you feel afterwards? blessing people at the same time just surrendering it all.
like a load was taken off of me to be honest. but what about the money? I could use it to pay for my medical bills…
does money make you happy?
no. it doesn’t. you’re right… California
do you trust me?
i do.
do you trust that i will take care of you, ari? enough that you wouldn’t only be willing to leave home to travel where i take you, but also enough that you could release the most expensive material things you have and trust me with your heart and life. that you can count any "loss", gain. that you
i do, God... if I have you, I have everything.
Remember, all of the money that you possess is actually mine. Remember that the government rests on my shoulders. Remember when I sent you random money in the mail through people you expected the least to take care of your physical needs in California? Remember.
Can you say, HEART CHECK?
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I don't know about you, but I want my heart to be like the woman's who poured out that perfume on Jesus's feet… the perfume that was basically a massive portion of her life's savings. Because to her, it was worth it when she knew the King was on the throne of her life. I want to be so willing to just surrender it and GIVE. IT. UP.
Here’s a thought process to take into consideration regarding finances that's changed my perspective and affected a lot of my decisions with money lately:
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If all of your money is technically Gods, what would you truly wanna spend it on?
If your LOADED father gave you $100, wouldn’t you carefully consider where to invest it?
That iced coffee you bought yesterday? You bought that with DAD'S money ;)
and He so gladly wanted you to be blessed, for sure!
BUT, it kind of changes your perspective doesn't it?
In addition, if all of the money you have is God’s,
do you not trust that He can provide it exactly when you need it?
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The longer I live, the greater I understand all of those bible verses about money that I glazed over because I thought that I fully understood it and had it DOWN.
But, I realize now how high I placed it on the throne of my heart. How I even put it above my mental and physical health! And EVEN the health of my relationships because
I was so worked up that I couldn't focus!
Can you relate? Have you felt this way lately?
I encourage you to take some time and write down the priorities of your heart and life right where you are. And from there, let at least 80% of your future commitments, investments, etc., flow from or add to those priorities. And trust that the Lord has your finances! If you are passionate about eating organic and healthy, get yourself healthy food! Doesn't God want you to take care of your body? Then wouldn't He help steward that for you? You are NOT an orphan! You've got a Father who is looking out for you. In this, I want to remind all of us to use wisdom. I'm NOT telling you to get yourself into debt and blow all your savings LOL.
BUT it IS time to free yourself from the shackles of a codependent relationship with money and financial worry and just trust.
Ask yourself, what truly makes you happy?
- Ari <3
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